Mwina Mawa?

Maybe tomorrow? As our silence has likely already said, we are still waiting... In Malawi, it's always: "Come back tomorrow." The train could have not worked for three years, and yet still the station worker would say "Come back tomorrow." I know this. In my head.

I'm anxious for all of the obvious reasons. One of the not-so-obvious is that we need to put a non-refundable deposit down tomorrow for our adoption home study. This will likely only be necessary (at this time) if the test results are favorable.

It's very difficult to sleep at night. I've asked Margaret to call us immediately, no matter the time of day or night. Each night I think, "Margaret may be calling in an hour or two." It's very hard to settle in. I feel similarly to when Johnny called and said my sister-in-law Katie was going into labor. Who could sleep at a time like that? I knew I could get the call any minute saying it was time for me to come to the hospital to watch my niece be born.

I'm waiting to hear if my son will be born. Into my life. And yet my uterus can't contract to let me know the time is near. A doctor can't see how many centimeters I've dilated. All I can do is wait for "Alex" to call Margaret who will in turn call me and Dustin.

Maybe tomorrow.